Age of Empires 3: Slog Slog Slog. Also Pirates

I was kind of concerned about starting Age of Empire 3.  I picked it up on sale forever ago, but never actually installed it.  It's got some refreshing new mechanics, though, plus the introduction of hero units.  Hero units, incidentally, aren't all that useful.  As the screenshots (yay screenshots!) will attest, heroes spend an awful lot of time dead.

Also, its a slog-fest.  Hour-long introductory scenarios are not a good thing.

Scenario 1: Hold of Jannissaries and cannon until reinforcements arrive.

They have guns.  I have crossbows.  Shit

"Every moment I live... is agony."  Every hero says this, every time they die.   It's like a little mantra.

In any case, my valiantly dead Scottish knight Morgan Black holds off the Ottomans until his Swiss buddies show up.  Victory!

Insert REALLY BAD cutscene here.  Yes, Ensemble, you've moved to 3D models.  We get it!  This is not the generation for in-engine cutscenes, I promise.  Please stop.

Age of Empires 2: Part 1

I actually finished a tutorial!

The Scottish resistance against Longshanks' invasion was a resounding success, thanks to Heavy Cavalry and Trebuchets.  Wait, what?  um... nevermind.  No, there isn't going to be any more detail than that, because wrath of ye gods the intro campaign is boring.

I must admit I was kind of dreading AoE 2 after the fiasco that was my playthrough of the first game.  However, its been so long since I've played this that I'd forgotten how big the gap is between the two games.  For example, units that will actually attack enemies on their own!  And production queues!  And Gates!  Win!

Etc etc, so on and so forth.  Now on to France, where I get to watch a "young peasant girl" save France from the Evil English.

....I finished a tutorial!